Comments on: Do you have a principal rule for parenting?

By: buzymomuv3boyz

buzymomuv3boyz — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 05:04:31 +0000

I have 3 boys, they are 15,12 & 5. My #1 rule is no blood, no flood, no fire, no tattling. If they tattle just to be tattling the tattler gets the same punishment!! MAN, I HATE TATTLING!!!

By: Paris'arrow

Paris'arrow — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 16:08:15 +0000

With that attitude you will be mired in a power struggle for the next 40 years. Your job as the parent is to grow your child up with LOVE and high self esteem.

By: London L

London L — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 19:48:18 +0000

I heard something today and it sounded logical. Dont back down, if you say no then stick to it. If they whine and throw a fit then that is their problem and no matter what kind of fit(or how loud it is) dont give in. Im 17 and my dad did that with me he also rewarded me a lot. He still to this day doesnt really have to ask me to do anything i will just do it and i dont mind because he does so much for me. He helps me with my bills and he pays for my phone and he all around just listens to me and can see eye to eye on what im going through.(being young and people judging me on that). So I have lead a nice life and i wouldnt give my dad up for anything. He gets mad and he will threaten to take things away and he did spank me when i was little… untill i got old enough were i would laugh at him(didnt make him to happy lol). But he is there and my mom has been her my whole life but she isnt good i dont like her because she doesnt do things for me she requires respect when she doesnt giive it and she likes to pull the “im the adult so you should listen”-word of advice DONT say that to a child. The child will see that as “okay, your bigger then me, how does that make you better then me” thent they will rebel and try and show you that they are just as good as you.

All in all what im trying to say is just be fair! Talk to a child, when their young get on the floor and play with them at their level and when they are old enough to talk get on their level and look them in the eye let them know that you care and that you respect them. Its human nature to want to do things for someone who makes them feel good and if you do things for them. If you want a child to empty the dish washer dont just say hey do this… ask them to help you do it and do it with them. Just like with any other chores. They are jsut as much a person as you so respect them and treat them like a equal human not just someone that you have to do shit for you and to boss around then you will have a huge problem on your hands.

Good luck!! Have fun with your pretty little one!! Congrats!

By: mamalove

mamalove — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 03:03:01 +0000

“know the whys”

this goes for both us parents and the kids.

for my husband and i, this means we’re consistent, and thought has been put into discipline, etc. generally natural consequences, for either positive or negative behavior.

when it comes to our children, we explain the whys to them. we never just say “no.” (ok, ok, when my five year old son asks me for the millionth time if he can go to disneyland when it’s an hour past his bedtime… we just say no… lol, but you get the idea.)

we think it’s important that our children know we are thoughtful about our relationship with them, and the one our family has with society at large. and so far we’re raising some pretty thoughtful kids!

By: Jennifer L

Jennifer L — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 11:14:05 +0000

Parents need to be on the same page when it comes to discipline. If that means sending the child from the room while parents discuss, then do it. There’s been a lot of questions on parenting on Y/A that essentially say that the parents have different ideas of discipline, with the more permissive parent being the “good guy’ and the other parent being the “bad guy.”

Children will try to play one parent against the other, but they should never succeed.

By: basketcase88

basketcase88 — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 19:11:34 +0000

I don’t know about one principal rule, but my husband and I both are big believers in letting children experience the natural consequences of their actions. We make their punishment fit the crime. Of course, our kids are 14 and 18, so we’re looking at the light at the end of the tunnel, my hubby just hopes it isn’t an oncoming freight train. LOL

By: Granny 1

Granny 1 — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 16:03:13 +0000

Yes, I am the parent you are the child, it must have worked they all are grown now .

By: CM

CM — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 23:37:52 +0000

Rules are a tricky thing. Every child is so different it is hard to apply any absolute to them. I generally agree that “the parents always win” The problem is in thinking quickly on your feet or having a plan for every situation. My mother always tells me never to threaten things that you can’t/won’t follow through with. You lose your clout and then the child won’t believe you next time. Easier said then done. But I try harder every day.

It is easy to say what you “would do” before you have kids and are in the situation. It is harder to look at what you “have done” and learn from it. Once you look at what happened you can figure out what you want to do next time it happens and gain some consistency. I learn everyday from my three young children. I learn about them and I learn about me.

By: 6 wks w/#4 Due November 22, 08

6 wks w/#4 Due November 22, 08 — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 06:04:55 +0000

Well I understand, But it gets rocky, when your trying to reason with a Autistic Child, a ADHD child,. I know no ecuse. But no one really knows how hard it is when your out in public.

We as parents, are not always right.As LiFE is a learning experiance. Sometimes my kids teach me! I just like to take it one step at a time, and I like to be sure that as my children grow up that they will always know that,

#1. Their is nothing in life that you and I can’t handle together.
#2. Trust- I will always trust in you, and you will always can count on me.
#3.Remember to always have RESPECT and it will RESPECT you.

Parenting will come with ease if your children understand the meaning of LIFE

By: rabbit

rabbit — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 05:26:16 +0000

Don’t sweat the small stuff. pick your battles (colored hair, an occasional swear word is much better then drugs or sex right?) learn to let go (this one I am having HUGE problem with… teenagers, ugh) and love unconditionally. My one principal rule is guilty until proven innocent i.e.don’t fall for that, it’s who they hang around or society that is making them do things, they have brains and you taught them right from wrong, don’t blame anyone but your own kid or your parenting skills.